if you love two people at the same time, choose the second. Because if you really loved the first one, you wouldn’t have fallen for the second.

Johnny Depp (via feellng)

Utter bullshit.

(via myfoundpolyamory)

I’m gonna go with nope on this, Johnny.

(via scurvypenguin)

This is why every time I have another kid I give the first one up for adoption. Also, every time I get a new pet I drown the one I already had; unless it’s a fish, of course, in which case I flush it down the toilet. And when someone brings me a houseplant as a gift, of course I throw the other one into the dumpster behind the grocery store. I mean, you can only love one of any given thing at a time, right? What ya gonna do?

(via imajme)

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