Tag: books

Messages from the Author of the ‘Forbidden Flowers’ series

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I’ve wanted to read Diane Rinella’s books for a long time, and I finally got them. There was an option for a customized message from the author, so I asked her if she could in one sentence tell me what I should keep in mind as someone who wants to write fiction that touches upon “taboo” subjects. Below are her messages, and anyone who is going to write about similar subjects could draw inspiration from what she had to say. (She addressed it to me, but I blotted out my name in this post for privacy reasons)

Diane Rinella's books

Without my name

“The only thing that matters when writing is that you do it directly from your heart. Much Love, Diane Rinella.”

Without my name 2

“Never be afraid to write about things that matter. Love Always, Diane Rinella.”

Published on by rainbowamoryLeave a comment

 

andantegrazioso:

“He’s more myself than I am. Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same.”

Matthew MacFadyen as Hareton and Sarah Smart as Cathy in Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë

My mom keeps telling me every now and then to read ‘Wuthering Heights’ as it is an example of great/classic literature… and I keep putting it off cause I have other things I need to read. I had NO idea there was cousin stuff in this… well then… I better get started on it. lol   I was going to read it anyway but this is just extra motivation.

Hi! Not to bother you or anything but I’m feeling really down lately because the majority of my friends have the automatic mindset that incest is terrible and always ALWAYS nonconsensual and anyone who ships it is a bad person and complains and I just need a reminder that there are more rationalize people beyond this awful mindset the people I know have

Published on by rainbowamoryLeave a comment

temporarychange1:

Anon, that is awful. I’m so sorry. That must be so hard for you.

This kind of mindset infuriates me.

incest ≠ abuse: abuse = abuse

Anyone who thinks incest is always non-consensual really needs to take a long hard look at the fact that they’re not thinking critically if they’re so sure about something and cannot even consider possible exceptions.

While there are a lot of ways in which a person can become brainwashed (for lack of a better word), it’s also really disrespectful and takes away a person’s agency to assume that they’re not consenting to something that they say they are consenting to. Like, just maybe there’s a chance they know themselves better than you know them, you know? (I’m talking about adults here, obviously.)

Obviously incest shippers are not bad people for shipping incest! Even if incest definitely was a  bad bad thing, shipping it does not make you a bad person. WE ARE NOT HURTING ANYONE.

And even through all the convoluted arguments about how someone might potentially eventually be hurt through incest shipping, the wrongdoing is not on us.

(Obviously we must do what we can to be respectful.)

fullmarriageequality and rainbowamory are two sites with a lot of great discourse about consensual incest and fighting that kind of mindset.

I’m sorry you have to deal with that, Anon!

I’m not saying you should speak up to your friends or anything – I can understand why you wouldn’t, and given the circumstances I would probably advise against it – but I do have to wonder what effect it would have if someone they respected were to disagree with them.

Hey shipcestuous, it’s very sweet of you to mention my page on your post. 🙂 I’m with you on the points you made in your response (especially the bit about thinking critically). I’d also like to add, anon, that you don’t have to have anyone’s permission or blessing to believe in what you believe. If they took a moment to get the facts and challenge their ignorance, your friends might think differently. But often times people don’t think about these things unless they’re confronted with it in a more immediate sense (like if someone in their own family or a friend they are really close gets involved in that kind of relationship). If your friends are willing, you should give them a good book or something that explores the topic of incest in an alternative way (focusing on consensual acts & relationships). It might compel them to open their mind.

The Need for Better Representation in Fiction

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hernameisgabe:

rainbowamory:

When it comes to subjects or themes that have social stigma attached to them, it is rare to see them explored in fiction with neutrality. Have you ever watched a film or tv show in which love between cousins is referred to as something distasteful? Something that only unsophisticated, backwards…

This is why I’m writing my book and running this blog.  🙂

That’s awesome! I didn’t get a chance yet to properly check out your project and blog but it’s something I’ve been meaning to do, and will do! I’m working on a story with trans themes myself. And someday I plan to write a series with a main character that is in a relationship with his first cousin from the age of 15 and up. Someone told me incest is a touchy topic but changing that detail about my character’s life is like saying there’s something wrong with it, which I will never ever do, no matter what, especially not to appease the most ignorant groups of people in society. My favourite genre is fantasy/adventure. I’ve always wanted to talk to other people who are working on or planning to write fiction that challenges social stigmas around relationship diversity (nice term by the way! the first time I saw it was on your blog). So good for you and keep doing what you’re doing! 🙂

The Need for Better Representation in Fiction

Reflections on a library website

Published on by rainbowamoryLeave a comment

(This is an old post I made on August 2014, about a website that reviews library books. It is about censorship)

Not going to lie.

This site make me sick.

⬆ These arrogant people sitting around judging others by their own limitations in understanding… I was just looking around for a good source of information about cousin marriage throughout history and I came across a book, then this page. I wanted to write a comment so badly but that option no longer comes up (old post I guess)… I’m glad not everyone in the comments below are completely ignorant.

But it makes me so sad to see some of the things said by a person that had cousin marriage in their own lineage… that’s how deep the stigma goes – that it would even cause someone to make judgements about their own family members. Sad, when even strangers that have never had it in their family are capable of being more sympathetic.

Books like this are so necessary in brining to light a topic that has so many misunderstandings attached to it and presenting it just as it is. It’s unfortunate that some people’s one-track minds can’t process the possibility that someone can love their cousin as their #1 choice of a partner, not as a last resort or due to GSA or because they were the “safe” option…

I feel like the key to getting grandchildren and children to accept the cousin marriage of past relatives is to come out early. Not too early that it’s incomprehensible to them, but not so late that they have already internalized the blindly perpetuated stigma.

I’m going to try and forget the anger I feel towards the haters and read the book because I feel I can learn something from it and share some valuable information with more open-minded people who know what empathy is.